Parenting - Expectations VS Reality
The first thought I had when my daughter was born was that this is my moment to do something good. In that little crib, lies a child that I can mould and nurture. All these thoughts, plans and ideas spun in my head and I knew it was going to be an amazing journey. What I didn’t realise, was that expectations are SO FAR from reality when it comes to parenting!
Expectation – I did a lot of research and found that it was much healthier and easier to make all my daughters meals. Invest in a food processor, cook from scratch, it will help you bond with your child they said.
Reality – It is much healthier and it was kind of fun, but spending time in the kitchen lovingly preparing a meal for my daughter – and displaying it in an aesthetically pleasing way – meant nothing when she refused to eat it.
Expectation – Another way to bond with your child is to clearly spend more time with them. I found a high number of mums were going to ‘mummy and me’ classes or arts and crafts with their children. I thought it would be fun to go for a walk on a sunny day, get an ice cream and feed the ducks! What could possibly go wrong?
Reality – Everything. It all starts well but soon she wants to get out of the pram and walk. Instead of feeding the ducks the stale bread, she decides she wants to eat it. Then, when I kindly tell her no, she has a complete meltdown in the middle of the park, with all the other parents staring at us. Only then do I remember the ice-cream! All goes well until she drops it on the floor and I call it a day.
Expectation – Even before I had a child, I knew I would always keep a memory book. So much happens in a day, let alone years. It makes sense to keep a record of it all and read back the lovely memories when the kids are older.
Reality -This is an amazing idea – if you remember to fill the books out. It’s been 2 years and the only things written down in her book, were all the expectations I had for when she is born. The irony! I couldn’t let a delightful book go to waste so I have made most of it up. She’ll never know?
There is a lesson to be learnt in all the above. No one is perfect and not everything goes to plan. In fact, all the unplanned moments are going to become the fondest memories you will have. Make meals with/for your children and laugh at the mess and fun that comes with it. Go out on day trips and when things don’t go to plan, learn from it and try again another day. Make memories every day and turn expectations into reality.
Reema Sabeen is a Retention Advisor working in the Support Team at ParentMail. She is a proud mummy to 2 year old Elayna and two cats, Dusty and Minnie! She has also published a book and loves to blog in her free time.